Even if I try to stay away, I keep going back to the same thoughts over and over. That is because certain feelings are true and they are not something I can turn off. As I said before they are there and there is nothing I can do.
Somehow I need to find a way to ignore these thoughts and feelings. I think I am doing good and have accepted the situation, made a reason out of it, put it all behind me ... and here I am at it again.
I KNOW! What I feel is not reciprocated, probably it never was anyway. Realizing that, it  helps me stay away, but that all is doing. The emptiness and the festering feeling of lost hope are still there. How can I fill that space so I can heal?

New year has started. My Italian cousin is trying to make me read the Horoscope for Taurus and all the forecasts.

After the total bust in the emotional department last year which was supposed to be the "Year of the Taurus", I do not even care to read about this year. 

All I can say is "2016 a Year to forget" for certain things.

Let me just say a few things to set the tone today.

1. GO TRUMP
2. Have you America today? 

 Number 2 above ^ simply is asking if you have done something to celebrate the greatness of this Country. That would include running around outside waving a giant American Flag, or go practice shooting (in a safe and responsible manner). That does NOT mean going to the streets and whine about your Obamaphone that I hope soon will not work anymore just as a symbol of the other idiotic things that have been shoved down our throat this past 8 years.

Yes, I am white, middle-class, live in Texas ... OH SHIT ... I am a LEGAL immigrant and naturalized citizen. GO TRUMP!!!

Is helping someone teaching them how to shoot and let them practice on your land qualifies as "Have you America today?" activity? I believe so.

I have a coworker that went through the process of getting her Concealed Handgun License (CHL), but had not practiced since that class (2 years ago). She asked if I could help her to practice a little so I have invited her to my house as I have a setup where we can practice shooting. I am not going into the details of all the corrections she needed. Let's say that she was closing her eyes anticipating the "BOOM" and as she was closing her eyes her hands moved and she was shooting kneecaps or feet (figuratively). After some practice and several pointers she was doing much much better. 

She also told me that other 3-4 ladies have acquired a gun after they had a class with one of our Security Officers for personal protection, but have no real chance to practice. She asked me if I was willing to teach them too.  These are all people working for the lady that came to my place.

Of course I said that I am willing to help. So, I can say that "I America" that day and hopefully will do several others.